I said to my soul, be still
and wait without hope,
for hope would be hope for the wrong thing

wait without love,
for love would be love of the wrong thing

there is yet faith,
but the faith and the love are all in the waiting.

Wait without thought,
for you are not ready for thought

In eating disorder recovery you experience times of wild emotions.  You feel that you are raw, out of control and so very disheartened about your lot in life.  Yet, being loyal to yourself and your experience is vital and reassuring to your recovery. What does being loyal to your experience look like?

Army Good Conduct Medal - It's what we earn in recovery. :)

Being loyal to yourself means standing by yourself, being a friend to yourself, and seeing yourself through a tough time.

Can you be loyal to yourself? Can you be steadfast and loyal to your body, heart and soul during good times and bad?

If you commit to being loyal to yourself, then you stay present and kind to your authentic self WHILE you are feeling fear, rage and despair - WHILE you are feeling wild cravings - WHILE you want to act out in destructive ways.

Awareness, necessary for eating disorder recovery, comes in countless and unpredictable forms. 

When we are not aware we do not have the awareness of what we are missing.  Awareness rises from a dark night gently through a slow dawn.  Or it arrives during a dark storm with the crackling blast of a lightning bolt.