Mary and Shh, A way to begin to learn whether you truly want to say no or yes is to give yourself the gift of time. Giving yourself time is not running away. It's giving yourself the time and space to explore your thoughts and feelings without pressure and in freedom. "May I let you know tomorrow (or next week)? "What an interesting project. I'll give it some serious thought." "Let me sleep on it." "Let me give this idea the time it deserves." You get the idea. Even if a project seems simple or easy, give yourself time to consider it before you make a commitment. It's practice in claiming your own mind and your own choices. It also teaches others that you are not as easy yes and you actually consider carefully before you make decisions.