I am hanging in there despite feeling so depressed for so long. I am so tired of everything right now. Being loyal to my experience I guess would be just getting up everyday and putting one foot in front of the other, when all I want to do is stay in bed and close the world off. I think I am more loyal to my love for my kids right now, knowing that if I give up they will have such a hard experience. I keep moving for them. But this takes strength, as I see so many people in my life who give up despite having children to live for. I feel like there are such huge mountains in front of me all the time. Climbing them seems so tiring a thought. But I do keep moving. I think that not giving up completely is a form of endurance.